Tuesday, April 24, 2007

Priorities

I just want to throw this idea out there. You can take it or you can give it right back.

1. WORK DAYS
Why do we work 5 out of the 7 days....who thought of that? How did that happen? Seriously...was it the Puritans?

2. THE WORK/LIFE CYCLE
Whose bright idea was it that we have to work really hard while we are young to enjoy all the money and assets we accumulate along the way, when we are old, saggy, and jaded? I have an idea. When you are young, you should be allowed to squander a ton of money and time. Just live a lavish life, gallivanting around with your other young friends, eating, drinking, laying around, going out, enjoying life....buying things, yachts, cars...whatever. Then, when you get really old and wrinkly and unattractive, you are put to work in an office for like 12-18 hrs/day....How can this possibly work? Well, you can take out like $5M, let's say, and party it all away in your golden youth. Then, b/c you took out that much $, you are forced to work super hard in your old decrepit age, without complaining. You essentially take out credit and work it off later - much later.

3. WORK HOURS
Yet again, who thought of this? What is with work winning the majority of people's time? I don't get it. When "they" got together to talk about how they would run their society, who was the jackass who was like, no, little Cleetis, we can't work for only 2 hours a day...it can't work that way, we have to work from 9am to 5pm, or even more! but not less!

5. W***
Work is an unattractive word.

6. EUROPEANS AT WORK
Don't get me started: 4 or more weeks of vacation. 3-hour lunch breaks....they have their priorities sorted out.

just kidding, guys, work is cool. it's so fulfilling. a chance to achieve Maslowe's top need on his little hierarchy of needs....self-actualization or something.
Gucci, Prada, yachts & booze or self-actualization...it's so hard.

Travel Tips - Rio

So, apparently Rio de Janeiro is notorious for lacking in decent accommodations. Which is strange b/c I wonder where Snoop Dog and Pharrel stayed, ate, and partied when they filmed their video in Rio.
But, if you go to Rio, here are just a few little tips:

1. Accomodations -
Don't believe the Portinari Design Hotel - I did. I believed their fancy website and outstanding lighting and photography. I also believed Travel and Leisure (which I always rely on), when they told me it was a good value - the only design hotel in Rio. Well, the whole thing about the Portinari being a "design" hotel is a joke. I should have taken my own pictures and posted them on this blog just to uncover the shenanigan they have going on in that hotel. It was like a Motel 8...let's just say. And then, there was this whole shenanigan where they charged my card when I tried to cancel the reservation after seeing the horrible room we were given. The hotel manager, a fellow Spaniard, offered me the honeymoon suite if I would come back again. Long story short, a couple of friends and I stayed at the hotel our last night in Rio, and it was so ridic. They had us wait like 1/2 hour for the room....then, we go up to the room and guess what? they had turned the conference room into a makeshift hotel room and tried to pass it off as such - which was awkward. they even went through the trouble of covering up the sign that read: Conference Hall with a sheet of white construction paper. so, of course, we ripped the paper off and took photos by the sign. then, i asked for a safe deposit box and never got it. then, i was told to make sure i checked out soon, as it was around 1pm....at which point I said, right, b/c you guys are waiting for the next guests who are going to occupy the conference room - which elicited a little chuckle from the hotel manager. All in all, an awkward letdown. total diappointment, and frankly, it was just irritating. irritating. and that's not good.

2. Food - there is a lot of good food in Rio, actually. So, head to:
Zuka - really cute place and super good food, and great service!
Copa Cafe - but make reservations
Pecado - really cute decor/atmosphere and super yummy food, and great service!
Zaza - definitely make reservations

3. Activities - paragliding.
Despite the incredibly awkward gear you have to don, it's amazingly exhilarating. You cannot beat the view and the experience. Just make sure you don't get ripped off with the price.
Foresta da Tijuca - forest.
It's really nice and lush and verdant and there are waterfalls, and views. definitely worth exploring.
Favela - ghetto.
If your taxi driver will do it, drive through a favela. it's incredible.

5. Angra dos Reis
T+L and several locals told me it's beautiful. didn't get to go, but apparently it's gorgeous to take a boat ride around there.

6. Beaches
They are ok. But, we come from the West Coast....so......

8. Best experience ever
Go to a soccer game at Maracana stadium. I've been to the world cup.....and this has more energy than some of the games I went to. I can safely say the brazilians at Maracana had more energy than the Swedes at world cup.

9. Going out
I'm a bit more of a grandma these days, so the only place we checked out one night was Baronneti. It was a letdown. It was kind of like an under-18 club with bad music, watered down drinks, a cover charge, and unfriendly people...I mean, we ended up having a dance party anyway, making lemonade out of lemons, but it was a challenge w/ the bad music.

10. Job Opportunities
If anyone feels like teaching kids in Brazil, I know of a school looking for teachers.

Sunday, April 15, 2007

Jazz Band

If you knew me in middle school you would remember me as that girl who told on the jazz band for smoking pot. There were 5 of us actually, but I’m the one you would remember. I became a social pariah after that and in part chose to go to a small out of the way high school just so I wouldn’t have to look any of them in the eye. There are of course plenty of reasons not to do drugs, but the only thing I knew at the time was what I had seen on those after school specials (a frying egg and a kid forgetting to pick his little brother up from school). So when Sebastian confronted me after school that day I drew a blank.

Fast forward a decade and I can think of plenty to say to Sebastian. Ironically at that secluded high school I managed to fall into a wild crowd and saw first hand what they were trying to convey on those TV specials. There was my best friend Ben who gave up a ticket to the Ivy League for a senior year of raves and serotonin boosters. There was Brittany who aborted her stillborn after one particularly bad stint. And Chuck…I lost contact with Chuck but later found out that he had messed around with heroin one too many times.

But I couldn’t tell Sebastian about any of this now. God knows I have no right to lecture anyone about drugs. I after all watched those scales come to life in the Stanford Tiki Gardens – shrooms. I spent a New Year’s Eve in love with crowds of people dragging their fingers through my curls – ecstasy. I tripped off the Candy Apple man’s distorted face in Disneyland – acid. I had heart palpitations at that Coldplay concert in Berkeley – pain killers. I watched that old African woman enveloped in flames with diamonds cutting her hands – Amsterdam drug…should have asked. And then there were all those Paris mornings, leaning out my window watching the morning rise in an iry haze – Sebastian’s drug.

And despite all the warnings my brain never fried and I never forgot to pick my niece up from school. Looking back I can perhaps attribute my success with drugs to strict moderation. I for example never developed a habit, and never had my own stash. It could also have been my wise drug choices. I after all refused the coke that night at Danielle Steel’s mansion and I always left the room when they brought out their needles.

I can tell myself all I want that I was smart, but I know as much as the next person that it was all luck. Every single “memorable” experience I have had on drugs has been equally dangerous.

The shrooms leading us up that 30 foot shaky ladder to the clock tower. The ecstasy high convincing us that we were sober enough to drive. The space mountain acid trip followed by the most terrifying hallucinations. That night on pain killers when I was sure that I was going to die. The question mark Amsterdam drug ultimately leading me to unsafe sex. And those Paris mornings…the problem with weed is that it puts your life in slow motion, and years at a time can be lost in a blur.

So yes, I fully expect that I will become like those hypocrite parents, telling their children how much different it was in the 70s. But for what it’s worth Sebastian, if I was thirteen again I would have done it differently. I wouldn’t have told on you and the jazz band. I would have minded my own business and left it to a higher power to decide whether to call it a phase or whether you would have ended up like Ben, Brittany or Chuck – may he rest in peace.
~karen

Sunday, April 1, 2007

Hot or Not

It’s out of style to admit it, but it is more important to be hot than smart…Effortlessly hot.

-- Kat Jiang, high school senior, 2400 SAT

A recent article in the NY Times discusses the pressures faced by a group of 17-year old high school girls in a yuppy Boston suburb. It’s not enough to make 5’s on all their AP tests, they have to be athletic, attractive and popular too.

I think many of us have faced this smart vs. pretty conflict since our grade school years. I even wrote one of my college essays about the challenges of being the only cheerleader in my AP classes. (yes, I was a cheerleader. I grew up in a small town in Oklahoma, where cheerleading was cool. I realize that cheerleading is a frightfully regressive institution, but I have to admit – it’s fun). I certainly wasn’t discussing the Fed at our Friday night football parties. Instead, I was probably trying to figure out how to get smashed while consuming the fewest possible calories, and then acting stupid around boys. Not that anyone was fooled. They all knew I was a huge nerd.

For me, a big part of the learning and growth during high school was about becoming comfortable with myself. Learning to be hot and hang out with the cool kids, without being afraid to admit that I’m smart and care about grades and intellectualism and college. By the spring of my senior year, my high school class had decided that I was the Most Intelligent Female and had the Best Smile. I’d like to think that they were right, and that I had succeeded in “being myself,” and being respected for it.

But when I went to college, I started feeling the same insecurities again. Even at Stanford, I somehow always felt like the nerd who was studying while everyone else was partying. And the cool kids still didn’t give a shit about intellectualism, or the Fed. To make matters worse, people seemed to think my cheerleader smile was fake and annoying.

It wasn’t until junior year rolled around and everyone started interviewing for internships that I finally began feeling respected for my nerdiness. Suddenly, those with good jobs were the coveted ones, and I was fortunate enough to be one of them. So eventually I came to terms with being “geeky chic” and finally came into my own.

But the underlying insecurity never really went away. It wasn’t that I suddenly stopped caring about what others thought; it’s just that others started caring about the stuff I was good at.

And so, the self-doubt remained – am I hot or not? The truth is, no matter how far society progresses, women are still judged on attractiveness first. And I’ve never really felt up to the mark. Maybe it’s because I was a brown girl growing up in the Bible Belt. Or because I’m short and curvy. Or because I have unruly hair. Or because I’ve never really been one of those girls who’s worshipped for her beauty. I’ve always questioned my hotness, because I’ve always judged myself based on what others think.

Until now. I am happily married with an enviable sex-life. My husband tells me I’m the hottest woman in the world, and, I can see myself in the mirror while he’s saying it. I look pretty damn good. I’ve come to realize that it doesn’t matter that I’m not tall, with silky hair and a flat stomach. And it doesn’t matter what others worship. I enjoy looking at myself. I am beautiful in my own way. And I’m pretty smart too.